Enjoying The Moment

Well, this is my view at the moment. Sitting in the back yard, tiki torches lit, mason jar lights around my pergola plugged in, citronella candles burning to keep the mosquitoes away and a glass of red wine. Peaceful. For now anyway. Trying to soak it all up and enjoy it and ignore the voice in the back of my mind telling me it won’t last. Telling me peace doesn’t last for long….that the anxiety and the panic will always be there waiting for me to snap out of my happy place because they have ALWAYS been there. If only I could capture a feeling the way I captured this picture. Except for me it would probably be a lot like this picture. Unclear. Fuzzy. Hard to tell what it really is. Beautiful flaming tiki torch or fire from the pits of hell waiting to engulf all of those deserving of eternal punishment? I can turn anything into something negative. There are the “look at the bright side” people and then there are the “come on over to the dark side with me” people. I would be the latter. Except I don’t really want anyone else to be engulfed in the dark side….it’s sad and lonely here. Except for right now. Right now it is peaceful. Pleasant. Even happy. Except for, perhaps, one thing. I think the mosquitoes that live near my back yard may actually like the scent of citronella! Just. My. Luck. ??? At least I try to find the humor, huh?